Well, I don't know about the rest of this stuff but I
do know how to change the icon for a Carbonite note.
Make your note. Then, on the Carbonite map, right click on the icon for your note. In the pop-up menu you get, choose "Find Note". That will open your "Notes" interface. Right click on the icon for your note and choose "Set Icon". That will open an icon list that you can choose your icon on. Just click on an icon and it will change both in your list and on the map. This is really easy but it sounds complicated (maybe it's just me
).
As far as the actual notes go ... Look in "
Path to your WoW folder\WTF\Account\ACCOUNTNAME (or number)\SavedVariables\" for the "
Carbonite.notes.lua" file. That's where the notes are.