Thread Tools Display Modes
07-13-10, 09:52 AM   #1
VincentSDSH
Non-Canadian Luzer!
 
VincentSDSH's Avatar
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 350
Blizzard is such a tease...

In the cold small hours of a certain Tuesday morning, twixt the too-tired-to-do-anything but not-tired-enough-to-sleep, a hapless mod developer decides to see what might possibly be interesting on WoW Interface. New mod perhaps? Developer question? Even, maybe, the beta invites being up -- naa, that would be a bit soon, wouldn't it?

Yet, lo and behold, a pretty red button sat smiling on the page, waving and beckoning our weary mod author forward with the sweet, sweet scent of beta -- concealing, of course, the hours and hours of work and head-banging that will inevitably follow.

Excited, the author clicks on the link and...realizes that age-old problem of "mods that don't break": Gosh, Skippy, we haven't updated the .toc on this thing in ages!

An edit of the .toc here, an upload of the mod there and volia! ... our poor author is told to chill out, wait over there, have come coffee: your mod isn't green-lit yet, no beta signup for joo!

A sigh of despondency floats on the air as the author knows 'these things can take time.' A forum post here, a little checking out of new mods there, and a what-the-hell check of updated mods and hey, HEY, HEY: it's been green-lit!

Like a druid on a gnome-gnom, our author pounces on the beta button and it the resultant page is gleefully devoid of red text and beta, ah, the beta has been signed up for! "Check back often: WE WILL NOT BE NOTIFYING YOU" is, of course, taken a bit too literally and an involuntary click of the refresh button occurs. "Bah, ya daft old fool: you just signed up 3 seconds ago!" says the brain but the hand, ah, the hand is ever hopefully. Several more refreshes are done amid admonishment from the rational sides of the brain.

Alas, rest must come and our author dreamed the dreamy dreams of a mod author in waiting. The blissful new functions, the updated and improved APIs, and the wailing and gnashing of teeth while screaming "why, oh why, did they have to modify that api in just that way: alas, poor function call, I knew it well: a return code of infinite mirth and useful data, now corrupted and co-mingled in..." Ah, morning, alarm clocks, and a Tuesday awaits!

There our author sits, staring at source code and slowly sipping the morning's caffeinated lifeblood of coffee: sweet, wonderful coffee: proof God exists and wants us to be happy and alert. A thought happens: should I? A hand creeps toward the other keyboard and... No, no, this is silly -- the blues said 'maybe Thursday' for the next beta round and it's still only...Tuesday.

Inevitable conference call with the client. Chattering away about this and that function, the other test result, and is the user training on schedule...yadda, yadda: same old version-release dance. Perhaps...yes, perhaps I can sneak in a refresh just...just for the sheer, unadulterated hell of it, our author thinks. I'm not excited, I'm not dizzy with antici....pation, it's just..well...there's a lull in the conversation, yes, that's it, that's all it is!

Refresh.

HOLY MOTHER OF INTEGRATED CIRCUITS: can it...can it be? A pretty little number staring back at me?

For the ten thousandth time, our author praises the invention of the home office and teleconferencing. "Time to start the beta download 'cause, hey, it's never small, is it? Then the patching... then..." goes out author, plotting out the evening's beta upgrades and digging out notes on the re-write that was planned for Cata, oh, yes, there was much going on in that poor author's brain.

A question answered and a bit of explanation and the conference all was running on auto-pilot again. Yes, http://battle.net please, mr browser! And with dispatch, I tell you! goes the author while a little, tiny part of his mind says 'er, um...yo, hey! author-boy, you might wanna..." but, alas, it is lost in the din.

Betakey, betakey, betakey, betakey, betakey, betakey, betakey is the happy thought as the browser says "log in or create new battle net account, push the pretty yellow button"

Then...

Then...

Tuesday.

I've always hated Tuesdays....

Blizzard. You...tease...

*stabs battle.net refresh button*
*foot tap, tap, tap*

*stabs battle.net refresh button*
*foot tap, tap, tap*

*stabs battle.net refresh button*
*foot tap, tap, tap*

Last edited by VincentSDSH : 07-13-10 at 10:25 AM.
 
07-13-10, 09:56 AM   #2
Cairenn
Credendo Vides
 
Cairenn's Avatar
Premium Member
WoWInterface Admin
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 7,134
*chuckles and hugs Vincent*
 
07-13-10, 12:49 PM   #3
unlimit
Lookin' Good
 
unlimit's Avatar
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 484
+10 Win Points.

Fun read!
__________________


kúdan: im playing pantheon
JRCapablanca: no youre not
** Pantheon has been Banned. **
 
07-13-10, 12:52 PM   #4
Xrystal
nUI Maintainer
 
Xrystal's Avatar
Premium Member
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 5,892
If you're not a writer ... I think you have found another avenue of creativity. A very very good read.
__________________
 
07-13-10, 03:18 PM   #5
VincentSDSH
Non-Canadian Luzer!
 
VincentSDSH's Avatar
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 350
Stirring slowly and heavily, battle.net opens a slight of an eye to look at the alarm clock and grumpily decides on another 30 minutes of blessed slumber. Reaching to slap the snooze button for yet another time, a groggy miscalculation finds it tumbling out of bed to land in an ungainly mass on the floor covered only in a sheet. Dignity lost along with sleep, it decides to get up, toss on a pair of shorts, open the door, and let in all the squealing little kids clawing at the door.

Our earstwhile hero, clicking on the pretty yellow button and steeling himself again for rejection finds an unfamiliar screen. Staring at it for a moment, his eyes snap open and he lunges for the keyboard. "Email address, email address...omgomgomg what is my email address?!" spins the author's mind for a moment before finding traction and trying to type to many letters at once.

Email address! Password! gimebetagimebetagimebeta wha?? OH, authenticator! Ok, now type in the authenticator correctly!

Click: download beta! /happydance

Clickety click click click-click: copy char, copy char, copy char!

Woohoo!

Click on instal...er..installer? Hello? I...I did download that, right?

Click to download downloader. Watches downloader download like an owl watching a mouse. Ah ha! Downloader!!! Mouse over cli... *poof* goes the downloader like rogue with 3 hitpoints.

Our author hears a tap-tap on the screen. Looking to the other side he sees a waving hand that points to a little window. Ah, the faithful virus scanner, protecting our author from the evil villains of the 'net. Ah, such a good old friend, what have you saved me from today?

"I detected a virus in that file. JOO NO CAN HAZ!" says the virus scanner before slamming the door.

A slight quiver of of bottom lip is all the movement in the room for some moments. Then, every so slowly, a soft pawing motion of fingers upon the screen punctuated by a wimper. "Noooo...mine....bring it back..."

A sob.

"Please?"

Oh yeah... It's beta-time alright. The pain has begun...
 
07-13-10, 10:03 PM   #6
Kodewulf
Premium Member
 
Kodewulf's Avatar
Premium Member
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 114
BRILLIANT!

Stephen King move over! A new master of thrill and suspense has arrived.
__________________
I will never forget. I will never regret. I will live my life.
 
07-13-10, 10:23 PM   #7
voodoodad
Large, Friendly Letters!
 
voodoodad's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 1,632
Try this;

ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY. ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY.ALLWORKANDNOPLAYMAKESJACKADULLBOY.
__________________

~ no need to make the message completely obnoxious - Cairenn

Last edited by voodoodad : 07-13-10 at 11:53 PM.
 
07-13-10, 11:48 PM   #8
Sepioth
A Molten Giant
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 894
Nice read .. thanks for the chuckle.

voodoodad can you place a space in there somewhere .. your messing with my browser
 
07-13-10, 11:52 PM   #9
voodoodad
Large, Friendly Letters!
 
voodoodad's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 1,632
Originally Posted by Sepioth View Post
Nice read .. thanks for the chuckle.

voodoodad can you place a space in there somewhere .. your messing with my browser
Yeeeah... Didn't quite come out as I imagined it...

I'm on it...
__________________

~ no need to make the message completely obnoxious - Cairenn
 
07-13-10, 11:54 PM   #10
voodoodad
Large, Friendly Letters!
 
voodoodad's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 1,632
Better? Or worse?
__________________

~ no need to make the message completely obnoxious - Cairenn
 
07-14-10, 12:06 AM   #11
Cairenn
Credendo Vides
 
Cairenn's Avatar
Premium Member
WoWInterface Admin
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 7,134
Much better. The thread formatting isn't all screwed up now.
 
07-15-10, 04:27 AM   #12
Hamstah
An Aku'mai Servant
AddOn Author - Click to view addons
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 30
Awesome writing - gave me a great chuckle

Looking forward to updates!
 
 

WoWInterface » AddOns, Compilations, Macros » Cataclysm Beta » Blizzard is such a tease...

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off