Why Parents Drink.

[CatfishKnight]

Why Parents Drink

Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope
with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing,
tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than
I am. But it' s not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt
anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people
that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know
your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son John


PS. Dad, none of the above is true.
I'm over at Tommy's house.

I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a
Report card That's in my center desk drawer.
I love you.

Call me when it's safe to come home.

[voodoodad]

Ohh, MAN! I have a 15 year old boy and that note would give me two major heart attacks and then a week of binge drinking!

[spiel2001]

~lmao~

[MidgetMage55]

Originally Posted by voodoodad Ohh, MAN! I have a 15 year old boy and that note would give me two major heart attacks and then a week of binge drinking!

Ill see your heart attacks, raise you 5 ulcers and a concussion from slamming my head on the kitchen table.

On the up side its pretty funny.

[Petrah]

I'm a mom, but still.... someone would get a serious butt whoopin' for scaring the hell outta me!

[Zyonin]

Uh oh, is this what I have to look foward to in about 6 to 9 years from now (my daughter is 6). I guess now is a good time to buy stock in my favorite beer company. If my daughter is anything like my Dad or I, things could be "interesting"

[MidgetMage55]

I fully expect something like this from my sons (6 and 9) as they are both total smart asses and that is TOTALLY my fault.

So all i can do is brace myself for it and also take a little pride in the fact that my kids have a wicked sense of humor and an interesting way of putting things in perspective.

Stocking up on antacid could hurt either.

[FrankN]

Originally Posted by Lykofos Uh oh, is this what I have to look foward to in about 6 to 9 years from now (my daughter is 6). I guess now is a good time to buy stock in my favorite beer company. If my daughter is anything like my Dad or I, things could be "interesting"

If you are lucky the "interesting" part is on the Y chromosome. But getting stocks of yor fav beer company could not be wrong

[Depresjon]

Originally Posted by CatfishKnight Why Parents Drink Dear Dad: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren. Love, Your Son John PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card That's in my center desk drawer. I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home.

Omg
Rofl

[us2006027321]

If I ever see that note from any children I have in the future, I'm grounding them double for justifying bad grades with worse rationale.

Good joke, though!

[Depresjon]

Books for kids